What is shaming? Shaming occurs when someone is publicly or privately blamed, ridiculed, or belittled, especially for not meeting implicit or explicit expectations. It is making the other person feel ashamed for some reason.

Brené Brown makes the distinction between shame and guilt. She says that guilt is feeling bad about doing something wrong, and shame is being that which is wrong, being flawed, inherently bad. This distinction is super important.

In the academic world, shaming generally takes the form of making another person feel (voluntarily or involuntarily) that they are not good enough to be in academia or to be a good researcher.

How shaming shows up in academia

Shaming can come up in different situations that are, unfortunately, very common. These are some examples I have experienced myself (points if you've seen or experienced them all yourself):

• Excessive criticism about activities that I was doing for the first time, which I was expected to know how to do, even though I had received no prior training or help in learning. Writing a draft or preparing a talk for the first time are some examples of this.
• Belittling or public humiliation of doctoral and postdoc students during public presentations.
• Blaming individuals for systemic problems, such as lack of resources to travel to conferences.
• Belittling or making fun of a person who has X amount of publications (implying that if I have the same, I also deserve to be made fun of).
• Phrases like “to be a good scientist you have to publish in X journal or in Y subject” (which implies that as long as I don't have publications in those journals and don't work on those subjects, I won't be good).
• Belittling or making fun of a fellow researcher for misremembering a small fact or for making a minor mistake. That is, if I make mistakes of the same type, I will be shamed in the same way.
• Comments like “you got that postdoc because you are part of a minority, because people better than you haven't,” minimizing my achievements, relativizing my work, and also making me feel somehow guilty for getting an opportunity that was "too good" for me.
• Glorifying overwork: working late into the night or going long hours to fulfill certain obligations, saying with almost pride, “I haven't taken a vacation in years”. Special points for witnessing mocking those who take a weekend off, especially a long one, with phrases like “I'd like to, too, but I have too much to do”, giving oneself moral superiority and at the same time implying that the other person doesn't have enough on their plate. And that if they were any good, they wouldn't have so much time on their hands.

Shaming not only affects professional confidence but also the mental health of those who suffer from it. Being on the receiving end of this behavior for years (perhaps your entire career) can easily lead to a feeling of inadequacy and imposter syndrome, loss of motivation, and lack of belonging (“everyone is fine here, but not me; it's harder for me to survive”). In addition, within the instability of the academic world, it generates stress, anxiety, and exhaustion, since your whole working life depends on how others perceive you. And if you are not good enough, you will not get a job, and this is also your fault.

The problem behind the problem: toxic academic structures. Shaming doesn't happen in a vacuum; it is deeply linked to the culture and structures of the academic system, which

• Reward productivity measured only by metrics such as publications and citations.
• Punish mistakes, but do not reward successes.
• Encourage extreme competition instead of collaboration.
• Invisibilize systemic inequalities, perpetuating gender, race, and class biases.

Why is academia like this?

Academia has been around for centuries, and our advisors have learned to cope with its ever-increasing, cutthroat competitive nature from their own advisors. Unfortunately, academia has a hard time catching up with good outside work practices. That is why these antiquated behaviors, which would scare off any HR department in a private company, are still common. To make matters worse, excellence is often confused with perfectionism. Thus, if you are not perfect, if you make mistakes, you do not belong in institutions of excellence. And therefore, criticism from your colleagues becomes a matter of life and death.

This is especially dramatic for women and minorities, who have historically had to fight for their place in academia. Perfection is demanded of them to prove that they belong, even when it is not expected of other individuals in an equal way. For example, as a general rule, in every department there is usually a male researcher who is a very bad professor, who is not interested in doing it any other way, and everyone knows it. But rarely are there female researchers with this profile. And in fact, they often end up being appointed to the courses of those professors who are “hopeless.”

The fact that the bar we have to reach is invisible generates an endless cycle of perfectionism and discomfort that often lasts our entire career.

Identifying and confronting shaming.

Learning to identify and respond to shaming is crucial if we want to create a safer space for ourselves and the future generation of researchers. How can we do that?

• Differentiate between constructive criticism and personal attacks.
• Differentiate between guilt (I did something wrong, but I will do better next time) and shame (I am what is wrong, so there is no remedy; I will always do everything wrong).
• Seek support from colleagues and mentors who share a vision of mutual respect.
• Identify not only the things we do wrong, but also the things we do right.

Building a healthier academic culture: Change begins with each of us. How do we help?

• Train academic leaders and model respectful behaviors.
• Creating spaces where feedback is constructive and not destructive.
• Learning effective communication tools to avoid continuing inappropriate behaviors.
• Promote more comprehensive evaluations that consider qualitative achievements and not just numerical metrics.
• Build a logic of growth instead of perfectionism, focusing on learning and giving positive feedback.
• Helping our students achieve their goals, understanding that they don't need to have the resources to manage their time and responsibilities, because perhaps no one has taught them.
• Learning to celebrate our own achievements. Healthy management of time and success and job satisfaction are difficult to model unless they are seen. If we don't celebrate ourselves, if we don't learn to take time off and disconnect, it is difficult for our students to do so.
• Promote a sense of identity that goes beyond academic achievement.

As part of the academic system, we have a responsibility to reflect on our own actions and work to build an academic community that celebrates collaboration, dignity, well-being, and respect among peers. Excellence starts with each of us.